amusedinred: (pants)
[personal profile] amusedinred
I'm the kind of person who thinks in metaphor more often than not and so I thought of one to explain my views on recent events here on LJ. If you don't get it replace sandwiches with fanfiction.

Sandwiches. Not everyone likes every combination of flavours. Not everyone has the time or the stomach capacity or the taste buds to eat every single sandwich ever made.

Sometimes we only have 15 minutes to eat and goddammit we're gonna choose a sandwich we already know is gonna taste fantastic because there ain't time to try that fancy new sandwich with that spice we haven't heard of on the off chance, however slim, we end up in hospital from food poisoning and hospital visits take longer than 15 minutes. It's not likely to happen but when you're time poor you need to make snap decisions which often lack any degree of risk.

How to increase the chances of your brilliant new sandwich creation being tasted and eaten? Talk to people about it. Tell them you discovered the best tasting tomatoes. Ask for advice on the arrangement of your lettuce. Go to sandwich gatherings and bounce ideas. Do you cut the sandwich in triangles or rectangles or squares? Do you cut the crusts off? Do you use a multigrain bread? Share your ideas with other sandwich makers and help them with their mayonnaise recipe. Offer to taste test their latest flavour. If we talked to you last week about your new sandwich and how exactly the strange spice will change our lives with how good it tastes, well damn girl, we're gonna really want to eat that sandwich. Sometimes taking risks pay off and someone will sample your sandwich on a whim and if they love it they will tell their friends about it and that's great, too.

Do make friends with your fellow foodies! Even if you don't eat their sandwiches for whatever reason, a cup of tea and a little chat goes a long way. Getting to a more personal level with tea (or other beverage of choice) and chatting is an important part of life and feeling part of a community. And hey, if you drink tea together often, your sandwiches are naturally more appealing. Do you knock on a stranger's door and immediately eat the sandwich in their fridge without at least being sure they don't store their ingredients on the floor? Even the silliest of assumptions often have very real biological foundations and it's just human nature to be cautious of the unknown. Some people don't even like sandwiches at all and we can still enjoy their company doing other things - like eating ice cream.

Some people don't like pickles. If your sandwich has pickles and someone doesn't want to eat a sandwich containing pickles, that is in no way a reflection of you as a sandwich maker and has nothing to do with how well the sandwich was prepared. No matter how well you mix those pickles with the other ingredients, they won't like that sandwich and that is okay. But guess what, other people love pickles and they are going to love your sandwich. Make pickle sandwiches for those people and don't try to force feed anyone.

Some people are allergic to things like bread, and we have no right to judge them and say hey we don't believe you're really gluten intolerant. No. We respect their right to avoid all things gluten and enjoy their gluten-free products. As a community who appreciate a wide variety of different views and ideas, we don't demand vegetarians eat meat and vegetarians don't demand people stop eating it.

Yes, it's lovely to receive reviews on how delicious your sandwich was or how fantastically satisfied and full they were after eating it. Enjoy the feedback and keep making more! Don't compare your sandwich to the cereal or the pizza or the pasta other people are making. They are all yummy in their own ways and it's completely separate from your own skills. No one likes to be told they shouldn't put salami in their sandwich if that's how they like to make it. And no one likes to eat a sandwich and then say it didn't taste nice to them because there were too many snow pea sprouts. It's naturally considered bad manners and the perfect quantity of sprouts is quite subjective.

Friends, food is good and lots of us need it to live. If we could all share and enjoy it in peace and respect each other's personal tastes and choices in how and if they leave a food review complete with Instagram photos of their meal then we will all be a happier community.

My brain. I actually wrote this entire thing on my phone while eating a literal sandwich and drinking actual tea. Lmao.

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